1-Are You A Real
If you agree with at
least ten of the following, you are a real teacher:
1-You believe the staff
room should be equipped with a Valium salt lick.
2-You find humor in other
3-You want to slap the
next person who says, "Must be nice to work 8 to 3 and have
4-You believe chocolate
is a food group.
5-You can tell it's a
full moon without ever looking outside.
6-You believe "shallow
gene pool" should have its own box on the report card.
7-You believe that
unspeakable evil will befall you if anyone says, "Boy, the
kids are sure mellow today."
8-When out in public, you
feel the urge to snap your fingers at a child.
9-You have no time for a
life from August through June.
10-Putting all "A's" on a
report card would make your life SO much easier.
11-When you mention
vegetables, you are not talking about food.
12-You believe in the
aerial spraying of Prozac.
13-You encourage a parent
to check into home schooling.
14-You believe no one
should be permitted to reproduce without having taught in a
middle school for a least five years.
15-You can't have
children because there isn't any name you can hear that
wouldn't elevate your blood pressure.
16-You can "sense" gum.
17-You think caffeine
should be available to staff in IV form.
18-Meeting a child's
parents instantly answers the question, "Why is this kid
19-Your personal life
comes to a screeching halt at report card time.
20-You believe that every
teacher can be a real teacher.
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